Tears are drying up...

From  the first post "I Have a Plan for You....


The Lord has prepared the way, overcome all obstacles thus far and
allowed us to be fully prepared to continue forward.  So far
he has not shut any doors, but rather continues to go before us and
make the path straight.  We anticipate bumps in the road, but
they will simply be ways that He continues to prove himself
strong.  Whatever the outcome is, we will praise our Lord for
the joy of following Him in His plans, for the sake of making His name
great!  This is not about us, or what we are doing, this is
all about what He has done for us, and in us, and now through us for
the glorification of His Son, we simply get to joyfully and gratefully
participate"

WoW - Did I say that?  Really?  It was easy to say such things when the anticipated outcome was good (in our thinking).  But will we really praise Him despite our planned outcome failing, despite being left in tears and mourning, despite confusion and uncertainty?  We will...and how is that going for us you might ask.  We are not so far out of the woods that we can see the forest yet, and I know that more revelation will likely come with time.  God continues to heal and yet we know that we will always bear a scar from this wound.

How are we doing with this originating statement?  Better than I thought.  His Spirit within us drives us to deep hope in Him and reliance upon our relationships with others for comfort and rest.  We have continued to pick up the Scriptures and read through His word.  One of the first things that God put in front of me was 1 Cor 7:30 - do not be absorbed with your weeping.  I'm not saying that I shouldn't mourn, but to allow obsession over it to dominate my life and actions needed to come to an end.  Yes it still runs through our minds, but we have been able to turn from that and find comfort in our family and in the Lord.  

We have continued to pray with our children, to sing our prayers at dinner time, to join in fellowship with the church worship gatherings, to read the scriptures, and reflect on the things that we have learned during this experience.  Life's priorities have certainly shifted for us.

We have also dug into learning Russian more diligently and urgently (hope that one sticks), with the anticipation of returning to see them, and many others, one day.  We have applied for passports for Anna and Gracie with the same goal in mind, and have made an adjustment to resource usages that will hopefully allow future trips.  We have signed up as a backup host family for Ukraine children coming in July.  We are going to send letters in a couple of months with dear friends who will be in the same school.  We will check on grandmas guardianship status in a couple of months also, and we will plan to possibly visit them again in the winter to see whats going on with them.  

God has placed people in our lives to comfort us and weep with us through the process of grieving this loss.   We are grateful and have been strengthened to press on to know Him more.  We have shared in His sufferings to some degree, and we know this has purpose for His kingdom - so in the confidence we have in God we find pockets of rest.  They will increase while the sting of the experience decreases...this process has already begun

The questions are getting fewer (well same questions - but meditated on less often maybe), but the experience will likely have an undertow effect on our lives for the next several months.  It is not debilitating, but I do find myself needing to fight against it in order to find joy and peace.  We want to live in the present with a hopeful eye on the future. 

Thank you all for your prayers and kindness toward us as we have walked down this road.  Each of you have been a comfort and healing agent in our lives and we so appreciate your love for us.  Not much more to say about this for a while I imagine, so it will be interesting to me to see how the story ends.  We will keep you posted...


4 comments:

  1. Phyllis and WayneJune 23, 2011 at 6:21 AM

    Your Godly perspective is an incredible example to us all. God is using you in ways you'll never fully realize this side of heaven!
    Love you all!...And still praying.

    ReplyDelete
  2. God is good. I have found myself saying that in so many different tones in recent months as I have been through tough and unexpected circumstances that break my heart. I've said it with a joy, with force, with doubt and with a question mark even.
    But it is still a truth that we can hang onto isn't it?
    Hang on Beautiful Family, many are praying for you, including me.
    Blessings.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Heartbreak seems to be going around. Thankfully our Hope is not in our circumstances. Thanks so much for your encouragement as we press on :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. We are here if you need us. Just trying to give you room to be alone and process. We love you all. The Wells Family

    ReplyDelete

 

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