Case Closed

11am
We spoke with Tonya this morning and decided to wait until the 4pm free-time to go see the girls before they left for camp.  We wanted to take them some snacks for the trip and encourage Katya.  Unfortunately we will not get the opportunity.

Tonya called and had talked to protective services.  They decided to get grandmother's opinion on the separation, and would then come to Kherson tomorrow with paperwork, and finally have a meeting on Friday to determine separation or not.  This is a big delay, but one that is out of our control, so we were resolved to wait.  It is crazy that they are asking her opinion, and not just acting in the best interest of the children...but they are trying to appease everyone.  If I were grandma, I'd probably think it were crazy that they were not asking me!  So we were resolved to wait, but reminded her that things would need to be expedited after that due to our timing issues.

We got a call 20 minutes later - bad news.  Grandma was at the orphanage and was not going to allow them to be separated.  She also said that she would get custody and move to Crimea.  It seems that  God has shut the door on this venture.  We don't know why we have come this far, just to be told "no", but it must be in everyone's best interest that this is the way it ends - so we will trust in God's sovereignty and goodness.  There is no other fighting option before us - she has persuaded them that she will take them home with her and persuaded them to turn us down.  She had guilted them with comments like "you are the reason I still live" (like where was she this past 4.5 years!?!?).  We feel like we have left it all on the table and given our very best effort, so we are now spent and tired and do not look forward to the long trip home with nothing but time to think about all that has transpired.
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An Update from when Jeff wrote this...After all of this, Jeff called back to ask, "Why is it, if Grandma doesn't have any rights and we have signed consent from the girls, do we keep consulting her???"  This whole thing is just nuts and he told them that we want to fight this thing.  All along, they tell us to fight, and everyone thinks this is the best for the girls and then they back off because of Grandma has pressured them into being very hesitant.  And poor Katya is not as loved by her.  Will she spend the rest of her life being 2nd best because people keep caving to this alligator of a woman?  So they decided to mull things over ONCE MORE and we waited and waited for a call.  When the call came, it was just a quick word to have Jeff meet Tonya downstairs at the Bible House where we are staying.  He came back up after 1/2 hour or so and said that apparently it is against the law for Grandma to be trying to disrupt an adoption that is in process with pressuring tactics.  We had been told that her "rights" had precedence and that if she got her rights restored, she would be the one to have the girls go with her.  But now we are told that all along, what she has been doing is illegal.  Yet no one knew this?  No one stood up to her and stopped her?  She was just allowed to come in and stir the pot again and again and no one knew this was wrong?  It's like they are telling us to fight but then giving the opposition the key to our door.

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2:15pm

So as I was writing this, Jeff came with Tonya and it is over once again.  Director is a cautious man and says he will not go against Grandma, and will not support a claim that she is intimidating them... and so we are finished.  As a final effort, we went straight to the judge to see if there were anything else that could be done legally.  The judge said it would be very difficult to prove that they were being intimidated and that without the directors support - it would be impossible.  She also said that Grandma would come to court and cause such chaos that everyone would be in trouble for letting it get out of hand.  Unfortunately, the feeling is that grandma will most likely not take the girls to Crimea, nor even out of the orphanage at all.  It is a very expensive region.  Tonya says Crimea is an expensive region and if she had even a small place, she would be getting a lot of money from rentals.  No one thinks she will do this and that the girls will continue on in the orphanage and nothing in their lives will change.  Once we disappear, grandma will disappear again also.   Grandma will most likely not do anything she has promised and they will be sorely disappointed.  Neither Jeff nor I believe this is over yet.  We talked to Tonya about the New Horizons hosting program and about having the girls come to stay with us and really get to see what is now unknown and be able to make an informed decision after staying with us for a month.  Tonya doesn't think that they will let Katya travel because of her need to take medication, but I am hopeful that now that they know us and know we will take very good care of them, that they may let both girls come and see what our family is like and to be loved by us away from all the craziness.  It may be that just Karina comes.  We will also be writing letters periodically now that we have an address.  In 8 to 10 months - we may call and find out if the girls are still in the orphanage or not and begin adoption conversations again.  We shall see.  So we will continue to pray for these precious girls and for their good, whether we are a part of that or not.

So we are booked on a train back to Kiev once again.  We will see your faces soon :)  Trying to take it all in.  For now, please keep these little ones in prayer...we will miss them immensely...at the sight of it tears stream down once again.  Too much to bear :(


9 comments:

  1. Wow! What an ordeal. I am so sorry to hear that things did not go smoothly. Take comfort in knowing the Lord is in control. Tommy and I will keep you & the girls in our prayers. Crazy GRANDMA!!!

    Love in Christ,

    Jenny Fagley

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  2. I have no words right now. My heart is broken for you. See you soon. LOVE TO YOU ALL. Amanda

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  3. My heart breaks for the whole situation. I am praying for God's best comfort for all of you.
    Big Hugs,
    Our Family

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  4. Be safe in your travels home. So sorry about the girls. Love you guys.

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  5. So sorry to hear all the heartbreak you've all been through. We will continue our prayers for you as you travel & process all that has gone on. Look forward to the next time we see you -- big HUGS :(
    Love,
    ~Beth Mark

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  6. Jeff and Amy, we will continue to pray for you. We are sorry for all of the disappointment and confusion. May the Lord's peace flood your hearts. We love and miss you!

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  7. So sorry, will continue to pray. Not over yet. But for now you guys probably need to just breath. Get home and recoup, who knows what god will do? Bless you!

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  8. Tough living Psalm 73:1-16 - but you have - now live the backside of the passage: v. 17-28. Depend on His promise v. 17, His perspective v. 17-20, His perpetual presence v. 23 & 28, His personal guidance v. 23b-24, His priority refocus v. 25, His portion for you v. 26, and His Divine purpose in all this v. 28c. He will make it plain, and in the midst of a very difficult time, He has provided a clear answer for today. Praise His name for this outcome, though it hurts - and is so hard. He knows what is best, and will reveal that to you in His time.

    Meantime, you did get the word out, modeled Christ, passed out Bibles, shared love and gave these dear ones (all those pictured) a new perspective on the Gospel. How much more can anyone ask than that!

    Love you both - let us know if you need help on this end arriving, settling back in, etc. We're with you 110%!

    Love,

    David & Carol

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  9. Praying for you!

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